Visiting a Familiar Place
The last ounce of light desperately squeezed its way through the thick trees as she quietly shut her closet doors. Smells of musty, yet fresh fungi adhered to dead logs along the enchanted trail of the forest. Their colorful layers led the girl in a directional path toward Fairy Village. Birds and insects serenaded her along the way with their songs. This young girl's make-believe place soothed her fear of the one person she had known and loved for eight years—her own mother. She treaded cautiously to avoid being discovered.
When she was inside her little corner of her bedroom, amongst the shoes and wire coat hangers, she never felt discriminated against simply because she existed. She was safe from the storm of her parents as the fairy folk reassured her each time she visited. The small girl often became frightened of the possibility of being pulled out from her world by her hair when she would hear her mother's high heels in the hallway. If she was discovered, the consequences might or might not be severe. She tried to shut out the fact that she bought home a bad test grade from school, and tried her best to mask the fear of being cut down by her mommy's hateful words.
She closed her eyes once again, and concentrated on the bird song, the deep scent of pine and honey flowers, and the misty glow of the tiny fairies. She was now in her happy place where no monstrosity could conflict humility and shame on her just because she was not as intelligent as her mother wanted her to be. Regardless of the salty tears that made their way to her lips, she could taste the golden cup of sweet nectar that the fairy queen had given her. She took a generous drink as flute music and lively drums drowned out the mad, womanly voice in the room next to her. What are you, stupid?
These fragile creatures made an obvious point to let her know that she was welcome in their world. There was no hatred there. They were aware that she was saddened from her travels. When they inquired about her dismay, she refused to give an answer. She did not want to break something so valuable to her. To do so may have destructed the empire she had created in her head. In being silent, she protected her imaginary friends. They appreciated her notion in keeping them safe. To honor her goodness, they placed a wreath of baby's breath on her head. This entitled her to become invisible to the unknown evils of her mother. You just wait until your father gets home! She hoped with all her heart that the magical wreath would have made her vanish from her mother's sight. If only it could have made her mother invisible. But, as it usually happened, the girl was discovered sitting in her carpeted closet. And as it always was, her spirit was broken by the poisonous words of her mother.
Luckily, she grew up not thinking that everything her mother called her was true. How can you be so dumb? Look at me when I'm talking to you, you idiot! She knew in her heart that those fairies saved her from years of humiliation. But ultimately, she had saved herself by creating a shield to guard her feelings from her mother's scornful tongue. Every now and then when life gets complicated for her, she revisits that place in her mind and she can't help but smile. Fairies indeed... people have a peculiar way of dealing with frustrations don't they?
Now that she has children of her own, she vows to never call them terrible names. Her children are healthy, hates taking baths, full of laughter, never cleans their rooms, mischievous, loveable, and filled to the brim with careless mistakes. In her opinion, they are all individually perfect. She wouldn't want them any other way.
Oh, and they never hide in the closet. They have no reason to.
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